OK, I think the easiest way to move with your husband is *not* to give him the address until *after* you've moved. The reason I know this is a good idea is because 5X knows where and when we're moving. This man has never bought one single piece of furniture or moved an apartment worth of stuff in his life. Let the games begin...
5X Bright Idea #1: "All our furniture is old. Let's not bring it. Just the bed, the TV, the X-Box and the computers. That's all we need."
Having never bought a piece of furniture in his life, I cannot explain to him clearly enough that you cannot buy a new dinette set, living room set, and two bureau's for $200. Even at a yard sale. Even if you beg.
5X Bright Idea #2: "I'll help you decorate and decide what goes in the rooms."
This is the same man who "decorated" my beautiful stone fireplace with plastic antlers, a rubber toy figure of Diablo, and taped gaming maps to the walls underneath the wedding and prom pictures. He also feels that a Darth Vader electronic talking bank is a great conversation piece.
5X Bright Idea #3: "We'll throw everything in a dumpster and move the bed and computers with a pickup truck. It'll only take a couple trips."
When 5X moved in with me 5 years ago, he brought a trunk full of Star Wars toys, 2 pairs of jeans and 2 t-shirts. He threw it all in the back seat of his car. It would take 2 pick-up truck trips just to move my shoes. Man can live on Star Wars toys alone. Women needs more than 2 truckloads of shoes.
But not much...
5X Bright Idea #4: "I only need help throwing everything in the dumpster. I can move the rest of the stuff by myself 'cause we're not taking anything."
WRONG!
5X Bright Idea #5: "We can pack up in like a day or so, even if you bring all your stuff."
I spent an hour last night just cleaning out the medicine cabinet and under the bathroom sink. That was the "easy" room.
If all goes well, we get the keys today and then have one week to move. He thinks this is plenty of time. I think it's do-able, but not easily. Right now, my only concern is whether I can take my cats. I'm ready to beg and plead. I'm ready to cry (won't have to strategically practice that - if they say "no", it'll come naturally and immediately). I'm even prepared to offer them one perfectly good delusional male who can lift heavy objects.
He'll make a great pet.
